When one door closes, a window opens….or so I have heard.  Many weeks ago, long lost friends and myself committed to spending the coming weekend together in Dawson Creek.  I have been thinking and dreaming about this weekend get away from the first mention of it. 

Then, things change.  I don’t think I could go.  Alot of stuff is happening in my life and taking off for the weekend seems very silly of me.  So, I think and think and think.  An idea came.  A plan hatched. 

Why not them come here?  Well, this weekend wasn’t my idea, and I didn’t offer up my house initially.  It is hard for me to ask for a change of plans.  I don’t want to step on toes.  I know my friend has gone out of her way to be able to host us ladies at her new home.  I certainly don’t want her efforts to be in vain.  Luckily, my friends are wise and kind and accommodating.  I certainly was okay with them having the weekend to themselves and hoping that I could join them next time.  Blessedly though, one of the ladies has changed her flight (working for the airline is handy like that) and the other is trekking down here too.  Yeah!!!

Over the past couple of days I have gone from excitment to disapointment to deep thought to giddy joy.  Who says I am not bi-polar?  I am greatful to my friends for making the sacrifice and effort to keep me in the loop and enjoying a weekend of girl time with them.

The three of us haven’t all been together since 1997.  Neither of them made it to our ten year reunion.  I was the nervous one scanning the room hoping to spot their familiar faces.  I cannot wait to hear about their lives.  I cannot wait to share my life with them again.  They hold so much of my past.  It will be silly and fun.  I have no idea what we will do this weekend.  I am sure there will be much eating and drinking and laughing and crying and picture taking and if they are game…I will post it all here for  ‘yall (don’t I sound like a redneck?)!

By nature, I am an individual who loves to debate.  It really doesn’t matter which side of the argument I take.  I love to sink my teeth into a juicy topic and have at it.  That being said, I really do appreciate hearing both side of an argument and I tend not to take comments too personally (I really try to at least).

I recently poked my head around a mothers chat room.  This is not something I normally do, mind you.  I scrolled through some of the topics of conversation and was shocked at alot of these women.  One of the questions was:  Should I allow my husband to go to a strip club?  HUH?  I didn’t know we could allow or not allow our spouses to do anything.  I must have missed the memo that went out detailing this new faucet of marriage.  Me being one to love a debate, I had to add my two cents to the growing list of comments.  Most being, you go girl, strip clubs lead to cheating and porn addictions….you put your foot down and don’t let him off his leash long enough to even pee let alone think of going to a strip club!  My two cents by the way go more along the lines of…..do you want to allowed or not allowed to do things?  Look at yourself for your own insecurities and work on those with your husband, and leave the ultimatums at the door.

The other topic of discussion that really got me was…..my ex’s girlfriend has hollered at my children…what should I do????  Being a step parent, and a women with a working brain (most of the time) I was lured in by this bait too.  Almost 100% of the responses were along the lines of…..I wouldn’t let my kids go back over there, I would make my ex put his girlfriend in her place…that is abuse….yadda yadda yadda….blah blah blah.  I will admit, I have hollered at Mckezni.  She has needed hollering at sometimes.  She is a child.  So here I am, posting my brains out about open communication and having all adults who care for these children sitting down and talking together, eliminating the potential for he said/she said miscommunications and hurt feelings.  I know, I am one to talk…..Mckenzi’s mom has barely said ‘hello’ to me over the past 18 months.  But, I am not mad or upset with her.  Her anger is her thing, it isn’t mine.  What I responded with was what I liked about our relationship in the past.  I think our homes worked best when we were all friends.  When Mckenzi had all of us on the same team, supporting her.  It is what I truly believe blended families should work for.  I get though, that it is hard to check your own agenda at the door with your hurt and your anger too. 

So from now on, I think I am going to keep my little head out of such debates of the heart and home.  I certainly have made a zillion mistakes in my own life and I am the last person to toss a stone.  But I get a topic I have feelings about, and hey, that’s just about everything, and I love to toss my words onto the pile and see how they stir things up some.  That is the shit disturber in me coming out.

How about you…what do you think on ex’s girlfriends disciplining your children and husbands going to strip clubs?

I was watching the news this morning.  I was up from about 2 am on.  It is 10:36 and I still haven’t slept.  I hate having migraines.  Anyways, on the news this morning, a community not too far away has been given notice that there is now a sexual offender living in their midst.  I guess the RCMP have weighed the risk factor and believe this man is a danger to re-offend and wanted the community to be more aware.  Koodos.  Now, the part that stumped me was this….the fathers interviewed regarding their new neighbour were shocked that this could happen in their sleepy little town!!!!  The one father indicated that it would be shocking to have a sexual predator in their midst…they don’t have any homeless or the crime found in a larger city…so how could there be a sexual predator in their midst?!?!?!  SERIOUSLY!!!!!  As a parent, I worry about anybody and everybodybeing a potential threat to my children.  Just because I live in a sleepy little village, I am not under the disillusion that my neighbour might be a jack the ripper type in farmers clothing!

I don’t really know what my point to this rant is, other than, I think we need to open our eyes and ears when it comes to keeping our children safe.  Just because your town doesn’t have visible homeless people (and trust me, there are homeless people everywhere) it doesn’t mean your town isn’t harbouring a pervert who is just waiting to take a go at your kid.  And sexual predators are a whole different ball game compared to other ‘undesirables’ in your neighbourhood.  More times than not, the nice guy next door who waters your garden has a shady side…and not the guy sleeping in the box behind the drug store.

When I read this article, I was shocked to learn that 53% of adult women were sexually abused as children!!!!  I have had my own close encounter as a young girl.  My father took me to the hospital to visit my great uncle.  Unfortunately, my uncle was in the intensive care unit, and children, I was 9, were not allowed in.  Being 9, my dad thought I was old enough to wait on a chair in the main waiting area of the hospital.  He was wrong.  A young man approached me and somehow managed to maneuver me into a semi-private phone booth within the lounge.  There he proceeded to fondle me and scare me.  I screamed and kicked and ran to the nurses station as fast as I could.  By the time they called my dad and calmed me down, the man was gone.  I was 9.

In a perfect world there would be no such thing as a sexual preditor.  All of our children would be safe and secure.  But the world is not this way.  By opening our eyes and ears and looking out for our children and those children around us, we can help keel everyone safe, or as safe as possible in this day and age.

The True You Feels Unappreciated

You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to do more for you. With respect to money, you spend as little as possible. You think good luck depends on maintaining good relationships with others. The hidden side of your personality tends to be satisfied to care for things with a minimal amount of effort. You are tend to think about others’ feelings a lot, perhaps because you are so eager to be liked. When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you base your search on information from your friends.

Ways I love to spend an evening sans children

• have Steve build a fire for us to sit around, drink wine and just be together
• snuggle into a booth at a pub and share a bucket of wings (salt and pepper please)
• watch a movie and have Steve’s arm rest around my shoulders
• spend leisurely time wandering around Home Depot or Ikea or Walmart (any place that would be a pain to take the kids for any length of time).
• eat good food in a nice restaurant with real chairs and real waiters and no indoor playplace or plastic cutlery
• spend time with our friends who have yet to start families.  It isn’t always easy keeping these friendships going.

Steve and I don’t usually go out without our children.  We have been trying to have a date night once a week though.  This past winter our marriage went through a very rough patch and it was something we agreed to make work better for us.  We don’t need anything extravagant though.  It is all the little things in life that add up to something special.

I think this is the longest I have gone without posting, in a very long time (ever maybe). 

I have been feeling really under the weather lately.  Tired.  Cranky.  Constant state of PMS (not really, but you get my drift).

It is hard for me to share when I feel like this.  So, I just wait it out, knowing that it in time I will open up again.  Hello.  Here I am.

I think I am starting to miss Mckenzi already.  She hasn’t left yet, but soon.  I am going to miss having an adult voice in the house during the day.  She is smart and funny and I enjoy her company.  I am sure she is counting down the seconds until she is out of our house, but for me, it is sad and bittersweet.  She is planning many weekends back here (3 before Christmas), so I guess we aren’t soooo horrible to her, or she wouldn’t want to come back EVER.

I feel bad though.  When Mckenzi moved to our house, her room at her moms was dismantled.  The distance between homes was less than an hour.  Close enough to spend weekends with her mom.  But, no room to speak of.  This hurt her.  This move back to her moms will be hours into the double digits away.  We only have 3 bedrooms in this house and 4 people remaining.  It makes logical sense for Mckenzi’s room here to be dismantled and passed to Emma.  It isn’t the same.  Mckenzi won’t be coming back every other weekend like she would have at her moms.  Even though she has plans to come home often, those are plans she has right now.  In reality, we hope to see her all those times, but we know she is a teenager and life has a way of becoming busy. 

Her life here is slowly being packed into boxes and stored away until she moves.  Emma is excited to have her own huge bed – what 3 year old wouldn’t love a queen size bed.  She is also so sad to know that Mckenzi won’t be around soon.  It is a tough thing for her little head and heart to process.  It is tough on Steve and I too.

I have no idea what our house will be like when Mckenzi is gone.  It won’t be the same as before, before she moved in.  She has made such a huge impact on all of our lives that our home will feel empty for a very long time.

Bobby Lou is growing.  He is like my other children, one day he is little and the next day I hardly recognize him!

I am so happy with the choice we made in keeping Bobby Lou.  When I was little my parents adopted a cat named Cassidy.  Cassidy and I were the same age.  We were both 19 when Cassidy was put to sleep.  Next to my mom and brother, holding Cassidy in my arms while she was put to sleep was the worst thing I have lived through.  Bobby Lou reminds me alot of Cassidy.  He is loving and comforting just like she was.  His favorite spot to be is curled up on your lap, face, back, shoulder.  He loves having his face practically rubbed off.  He is very playful but never uses his claws…he prefers to chop with his teeth!

He crawls into bed with me every night and throughout the day is with me, by my side.  Having him in the house brings me great comfort.  At first, the girls were too rough with him.  It was hard for me.  I didn’t want to get rid of him, but I didn’t want him living in peril either.  The girls have calmed down considerably now.  And Bobby Lou, he likes them.  He seeks them out for play time.  He sleeps curled up in Hannah’s back.  He lets her carry him around, body limp and hanging.  We are a family.

Bobby Lou is great at fitting into small places.  He is a little naraleptic and we find him zonked out all over the place…even in cubby holes!

Bobby Lou has big paws to fill.  His has great cat’s like Cassidy and Miller to live up to ….Miller was the cat I had after Cassidy.  He was another great love in my life!  But, he is a story for another day.  I can see Bobby Lou meaning the same to Emma and Hannah as Cassidy and Miller have meant to me.  I can see him growing old in our house, and finding peace in my arms when it is him time to leave too.  I love this little cat…even his teeth!

Maybe you don’t know, but I love to cook.  When I first started preparing all of my meals it wasn’t easy.  My mom tried very hard to make sure I had the basics down in the kitchen before she passed away.  I remember her going over her recipes with me.  You know, the ones she had only in her head.  Meals that you wouldn’t find in any cook book, but that were special to our family (macaroni with hamburger, green peppers, tomatoes and onions). 

When she finally died, I resisted my duties in the kitchen.  I was only 15 so it was understandable.  I will never forget my first attempt at meatloaf….1 pound of hamburger molded into a loaf pan and shoved into a 350 degree oven for an hour…yummy!  My dad and I ate at the White Spot, alot.

I  don’t remember when it happened exactly, but I fell in love with my kitchen, with food and with the art of cooking (not baking mind you).  Steve jokes that my ability to provide good food was one of my major selling features!

I figured I would like to start to share some of my cooking with you.  It is also a way for me to start putting together my recipe collection for Emma and Hannah.  Please comment on my cooking…tell me you loved it (if you tried it) and please, tell me how to make it better.  I have pretty thick skin (growing up with 3 older brothers will do that for a gal).

Roast Beef

In a large zip lock bag, I combined 2 tbps crushed garlic, 1.5 cups red wine, 2 tbsp lemon juice, salt, pepper and 2 bay leaves.  To this, I add a 3-4 lb roast…I used to rump roast for this one.  This should marrinate for at least a few hours, over night is better.

Once you remove it from the bag, pat it dry and place it in a large, oiled pot/pan that has been heated.  You need to brown all sides of the roast in this pot.

Once all sides of the roast have been browned, place roast in roasting pan and cover with marinating juices.  Place in oven at 450 degrees for 30 minutes and then drop the temperature to 275 degrees for 1.5 hours (or until desired temperature).

Please do not forget to let this rest for about twenty minutes.  It just isn’t the same if you don’t.  I would love to show you the final shots of my roast beef, but my husband was in charge of pulling the dinner together while I was at baseball with Emma….and by the time I got home, the roast was carved and plenty had been eaten!

With this roast I made mashed potatoes (russets).  I used the juice from the roasting pan and made gravy too.  We had steamed carrots and nibblet corn as well.  I love roast beef for supper.  I am not a fan of the gravy.  Instead, I slather my roast in horseradish!  I think my favorite part(s) of this meal are the smell of the house as the meal is cooking, and cold roast beef sandwiches on whole wheat bread with horseradish and nothing else!

This is just one of the ways I cook a roast.  I love to use my slow cooker too, and I am always looking for new ways to prepare this meal, so please leave some comments as to how you do your roast beef!

PS…my family enjoy eating our meats a little more on the rare side, so please, adjust your cooking time if you don’t like your meat a little bloody!

Whiskers on kittens and bright woollen mittens….these are a few of my favorite things….and BOOKS!

If you have been to my house and used my washroom, you will know I am a book lover.  I have a very well worn library card stashed in my wallet and I am on a first name basis with the lady who checks out my books in Hay Lakes as well as Camrose.  My favorite place to buy books is Audrey\’s on Jasper Avenue in Edmonton!  We used to live just around the corner from this haunt of mine and I would spend many an afternoon winding my way through stacks, devouring all that is the written word.

I even have a category here in the blog that is dedicated to all my lovely book reviews….sorry, have been very lax lately in getting these done!  Must amend that!

Some of my favorite books are….

1. Last of The Really Great Wangdoodles,  check it out here!  I first read this book when I was in grade 3 and fell in love with it right away.  I read it every year after until grade 7.  I have been hinting that I would love this book to be a part of my collection.  I cannot wait to read it to the girls when they are a little older.
2. The Birth House by Ami McKay.  I read this book just after I had Hannah (baby #2).   I am a huge supporter of midwifery services and think that this Canadian author has done such a wonderful job in capturing a moment not only women’s history but our countries too.
3. She\’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb.  There was a time way back when, when my aunty Valerie and I would share the book of the month from the Oprah book club.  This was the first book I read from those books and I really related to alot of this story.
4. The Deep End of The Ocean, again this was part of Oprah’s book club, and a book I shared with my aunty.  I wasn’t a parent when I read this book, but I was a kid who had lost her mom, so the book touched me deeply.
5. On one of my days stalking the shelves of Audrey’s I came across Good In Bed.  Initially I was drawn to the book because of the tittle and the cover (the book that I own) is of a fuller set of legs, crossed and pointing up in air…like you just know the women is on her back!  This is my kind of women, I thought.  I had never heard of Jennifer Weiner before and so thought I would love to try a new flavor of author.  And I am soooo thrilled I did.  After devouring Good in Bed, I jumped onto my # 6 book, In Her Shoes and followed it up with # 7, Little Earth Quakes.  I can’t say enough about this author.  I can relate to her characters in so many ways.  I love them all, and I love her written words.  I have every one of her books and follow her site sort of like a stalker (shss though).

             8.  Water for Elephants is a book I have just recently read and loved.

             9.  Job: A Comedy of Justice was introduced to me by my husband.  He isn’t much of a     reader, but this is his favorite book of all time, and I wanted to read it too.

            10.  Wheel of Time books from Robert Jordan.  There are more books in this series that I can name or count.  I own them all and love them.  I didn’t come into fantasy until I was into my twenty’s, but today, consider this genre to be one of my favorites. 

            11.  Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West.  Again, I came to this book simply from the tittle.  I love all things Wizard of Oz…although I have never read the book (I know, I know).  Long before the musical and all the hype over this book, my husband popped into Audrey’s and picked this up for me one day.  I struggle with Maguire’s writing style, but I ate it up.  Since then, Steve has completed my Maguire collection and I have to say, Mirror Mirror could possibly be on this list as well.

This is a good start for me.  I can honestly say that I read at least 3 books a week.  I devour them so fast Steve begs me to get them from the library and not buy everything I want to read.  Not only do I read my own books, but I often will read Mckenzi’s books either along side her or before she has a chance to get to them.  I love talking about books and sharing ideas on characters, and love being able to do this with Mckenzi.  It is for this reason I have read all the Twighlight books as well as the Night World series.

What are your favorites?

Tonight we will go to the restaurant where Steve proposed.  Today is our anniversary.  We have been married for seven years.  Some days it feels like seventy, some days it feels like time has flown by. 

I married the first boy I fell in love with.  Our lives crissed crossed for many years before we walked down the isle.  I know there is such a thing as kismet and fate.  As many times as Steve and I have been tossed together, there has to be a sense of destiny in the universe. 

In the past couple of years Steve and I have learned that our families go back much further than our own 20 year history.  Seems the Watson family stepped in and helped the Richier (my grandpa’s family) family when my great grandfather died early in life, leaving seven children and a wife behind.  They were neighbours and friends and without the Watson’s, my grandfather’s farm wouldn’t have survived.  Our great grandparents were friends and went to each others weddings.  Our grandparents were friends.  Steve’s aunt and my uncle worked together and my mother in law and my aunt are friends too.  Our lives have been woven together for generations.  It feels right that together we have made a life and family.  Even if it is miles from the place our families call home.

Seven years ago right now I was at my dad’s house, getting my makeup done.  Chaos was reigning at my dad’s house where I was getting ready.  It was the best day.  The first best day of many as Mrs. Watson. 

This is us as we made our way back down the isle of the church, our vows taken.  I was thrilled and so beyond happy. 

This is the car that brought me to the church and whisked us off to Tim Horton’s for a treat after the wedding.  Behind our car is the vintage bus that our wedding party followed us in.  On the stairs of the church you can see a very young, lovely little Mckenzi.  She was having too much fun blowing the bubbles.

Our wedding party wasn’t traditional.  I had Jon and Sandy stand with me.  Steve had Carlton and his brother Derek.  Mckenzi was our ring girl and Kennedy and Kaitlyn, cousins of each Steve and I were our flower girls..well actually, they were all faeries with lovely custom made wings!

We had a glorious supper of ribs and chicken.  We had tiered trifles instead of a wedding cake, and we danced all into the night.  On our way into the hotel there was a very drunk lady waiting for a cab.  As Steve held his hand for me to climb out of the back seat the lady looked at me and asked me if Steve was my ‘old man’…I laughed and answered yes. 

It was a glorious day.  I couldn’t have imagined it any better than it was.  The seven years since have seen us move, start new jobs, have Emma, have Hannah, move to the county and buy our first home.  There have been ups and downs and all arounds.  But, I love Steve still.  He still curls my toes in a good way.  I am still proud to be his wife.  He is still my best friend…even if some days that is hard to remember.  So, twenty years of knowing him, seven years of marriage and we are still counting.